In my last blog, I addressed the question: What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up? This time around, I want to talk about this question from a different perspective. Many of us sometimes confuse the verb Be with Do. We spend a lot of time wondering what to Do with our lives, rather than defining what it means to Be in our lives. This is the meaning behind the clever saying: I am a Human Being, not a Human Doing.
We are reminded that what we Are is more important than what we Do. If we emanate love, compassion, forgiveness, understanding and gratitude, that will flavour everything we do and make it meaningful in the process!
When I was a young mother and had three pre-school children, I was often anxious and frantic, wanting to do something important in my life, besides raising my children. How ludicrous this seems now! What could possibly be more important than that? My main regret, if you can call it that, is that I wasn’t able to cultivate more of what I wanted to be, and surround my children with that beingness. Luckily, in mid-life when the children are grown up, I get a second chance to build my relationship with them with the love and consciousness that I lacked twenty years ago.
Many of us have a deep yearning inside to do Something, to be Something, to share Something, yet we cannot quite get a handle on what that Something is. As I am in touch with many beautiful souls who are like-minded and like-spirited, I see a couple of themes emerge.
One theme is: What should I be doing? This seems to mean that many are struggling with finding a satisfying career or vocation that includes and embraces their spiritual values and leanings.
A second theme is: Why isn’t my healing practice materializing/growing/thriving? While many seem to have a successful practice or “business” doing readings, healings and other services, others are struggling to create this. I hear a frustration with these people, who are wondering why their dreams aren’t coming true. There also seems to be frustration building when others make comments such as: Follow your intuition, Let the job find you, Stop trying so hard, The job is already there, you just need to raise your vibration to meet it. Although this is all good advice, I suspect the person on the receiving end can be left wondering what he or she is doing wrong.
Maybe I’m too pragmatic, but I think that it is great to put out the intention but the bills still have to be paid. It’s okay to take a less-than-ideal job, be grateful for what it does give you, and continue to be open to new and better opportunities that might feel closer to your desires and sense of purpose.
I also wonder if, with all the wonderful words and works and teachers and cute pictures with profound sayings, we are misled to believe that every single one of us should “make a living” or at least have a lucrative sideline as a psychic, angel therapist® , writer of spiritual books or sage dispensing ancient wisdom.
I admit to struggling with all of the above and what has become clear to me is this: It all comes back to the Being versus Doing thing. Even in my highest energy space, clearest mind and happiest state, a “healing practice” has never come easily for me. Am I doing something wrong? Is my vibration not high enough? Well, those are the wrong questions. The right question is: Am I emanating love each and every day in my career, vocation, personal life or any other aspect of my existence?
If you have not read “The Way of the Peaceful Warrior”, I suggest you do. It was the first “spiritual” book I read when I discovered I was on a path well over fifteen years ago. The sage in this book works in at a gas station and I think we can learn a lot from this. It doesn’t matter what we Do as long as we remember who we Be. (Well, that was terrible grammar! Remember who we Are!)
My current job in the tourism industry may not look very spiritual from the outside. But each interaction I have with a volunteer, every time I smile at a passenger, every piece of trash I pick up from the sidewalk, every email I send out, is an opportunity to emanate a little more love, and isn’t that the point?
The more we let go of how things should look and accept how things are, the easier it is to Be our highest selves in each situation. I no longer worry about a Healing Practice. My goal now is to be a Healing Presence.
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This really means What do you want to Do, but you get the idea. We all had dreams when we were children, of what our lives would look like when we grew up (whatever that means!). From Mommy to Cowboy, Doctor to Princess, Fireman (or more PC nowadays, Firefighter) to Astronaut, we had visions of ourselves in the future and I am not assigning a gender to any of these!
Some of us came to this planet and this life with a clear idea of what we should do. My youngest son was just a toddler when he grabbed the microphone at a talent show and wouldn’t let go. He was able to verbalize in grade school that he knew he was born to entertain. With twin vocations of acting and video game testing, he’s definitely living his purpose!
My boys’ father, from whom I’ve long been divorced, was one of the few people I knew at the time who was able to say he loved his work. He was an “air balance technician”, which meant he worked on heating and ventilation systems and corrected air flow problems. He once stated that his purpose in life was to make people feel comfortable, and I remember wishing that I knew what my life purpose was.
So I grazed and dabbled, trying out different jobs. I have been a newspaper reporter, server (waitress, in ancient terms), gas station attendant, school teacher, community support worker and a volunteer in many, many different settings. I’ve never known what exactly I should do, so I tried things. Work was like a smorgasbord and I nibbled here and there.
I remember when I was in my late twenties I took a book out from the library called “What Colour is Your Parachute?” and it was all about identifying the traits your ideal job would have. I diligently filled out all the questionnaires and I remember some of the traits I was looking for. I didn’t know then about Divine Timing. It took another twenty-five years to finally manifest it!
I wanted to do some office work because I like to type and file and organize and create documents. I wanted to be around people in a superficial way, being friendly and sociable and giving them good service. I wanted variety, as this Gemini mind gets bored quite easily. I wanted flexibility so my growing family’s needs would still be met. And I didn’t want to have to get up super-early.
Last fall, after a job contract ended, I had the opportunity to take some time off. I was a little restless and anxious but did my best to enjoy having time to myself. Then a family crisis hit, and I was so grateful that I didn’t have a job to contend with. I was able to take care of myself and the emergency, and eventually everything fell into place in the best possible way. The time was approaching for me to get back to work.
I kept an eye on local job sources, and applied for the occasional job. Several times after an interview, I called back and asked to be withdrawn from consideration, as the job just didn’t feel right to me. Twice, the prospective employer said to me, “Are you sure you want to proceed?” That to me was the universe shouting at me to be SURE, and not take a job out of fear, panic or habit. So both times, I said, “Since you have asked me that question, my answer is No.” I felt that the universe was giving me a sign and also an opportunity to be awake and clear in my decisions.
Then I saw a little ad one day, and I kept looking at it. On the last day, I applied, and by the next morning, I was hired. I get to do some office work: answering phones, typing, making reservations, organizing the filing cabinet. I am around people: welcoming tourists from all over the world, and supervising students and volunteers. My duties are varied: sitting at the computer or checking the safety list, counting money or making tickets, running reservations over to the nearby restaurant or organizing the volunteer duties. I work six days a week during the summer but can get time off in the winter and spring. And twice a week, I get to come to work at 3 pm!
I was determined this time to take a job for the right reasons, and I am so glad I held out. I trusted in my angels and the universe to bring me what I really desired. I am now the train manager and office assistant at the Kamloops Heritage Railway. I really love my work days. I learn and grow and connect and have fun.
The week after I started my new job, I was walking down the street and saw a sign with a saying many of us are familiar with, and ALL of us want (see below). To me, it was yet another sign from the universe that I had taken the right job.
Visit our website at www.kamrail.com and also like our Facebook page! Our amazing steam locomotive is 100 years old this year. Locals, stop by and say hi. The rest of you, I hope you will visit Kamloops one day and take a train ride into the past.
I am a Mystic Angel with some Fairy energy whose Life Purpose is to learn, teach and share the esoteric and mysterious.